Posted by danielle
on December 15, 1999 at 17:47:40:
In Reply to: Re: Wife/mother with ADD posted by Camille on December 03, 1999 at 14:45:57:
: Hi, I have been treated on various medications for depression over the past 2 years. My inability to take care of the house and the kids has been very hard. I wanted so desparately to do a good job, but seemed to fail every day. This has been coupled with the life long feeling I've had that I AM A FAILURE. My son is also being treated for depression, and has the same symptoms. We both seem incapable of handling our short comings. In therapy we have examined the past, tried all kinds of meds. Quite by accident we had what seemed to be a miracle. I am on Wellbutrin 150 mg twice a day. Somehow, I have been able to focus enough to get my jobs done, at least to my satisfaction, I've been more consistant with my kids, and have been very "normal" in terms of how I view my failures, or letting things get away from me. I've always felt that I had to be perfect, or there was no use to my even existing. There was NEVER a medium ground. It was so painful to live that way and see my son head off in that direction. Today, I am more able, but not perfect, and for the first time in my life THAT'S OK!! I can't recall ever feeling happy, when it wasn't connected with thinking I had done something perfect. Now, I'm told that Wellbutrin is one of the meds used to treat ADD, and it all makes sense now. I also have a new insight in to how to help my son.
Re:wife/mother with A.D.D.
You are not alone! Me too! I am 39 and was just diagnosed recently by my sons' psychologist. I suspected I had ADD when my oldest son was finally and properly diagnosed.
It's so frustrating when the medical/mental health community is so brain-dead when it comes to ADD.
Right now I'm on another journey, this time changing doctors (again) to find a medical doctor who can prescribe the right kind of medication for both my children and myself.
It's the holiday season and help is scarce right now. We have an appointment with a doctor who was recommended by a colleague of my husbands. This man and his son also have ADD. The appointment isn't until February though! So, you can imagine my impatience.....
If you know of any doctors in the Sacramento area who treat ADD and are taking new patients, please feel free to e-mail me. ditto that if you know of any support groups. I've just joined CHADD, but haven't yet received any materials or call backs from them....again December is a difficult month for everyone!
I feel better knowing there are other women out there like me. I don't get support from my mother or sister about this (even though I suspect my mom and my niece might be ADD!) I'm reading Women with ADD by Sari Solden. I highly recommend it! Also, I just got a cleaning service in twice a month, and I have to tell you that the support sure helps! Fortunately my husband is supportive in this way and even though it's a stretch for our budget, it certainly makes life easier!
Good luck to all of you, and thanks for your comments. I'll be back on this site to chat again soon....we all need this support! And no, we aren't "defective" our minds work in a circular fashion, and isn't that more interesting than our boring, linear counterparts?
I hope to hear from you all soon.
Happy Holidays! (do takeout and cookies from the store bakery, it's easier!)