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Posted by Kat on February 01, 2000 at 09:28:29:

I am desperate for advice. I am taking my 8 almost 9 year old daugther to Kansas University Medical
Center for testing. I know she is ADD. I do not want to give her medication. Is there anything else I can
do? I have a 4 year old son with Autism, that has done great w/ a GF/CF diet and supplements.
I love my daughter so much. She cries all the time and ask me: Mom, why am I stupid, why can't I be
popular, Why don't I have a best friend, why is school so hard, why can't I do anything good and Mom
will you promise that you will always be there for me because all I have is you? She is breaking my heart
and I don't know where to turn. I know alot of people take medication but I do not want to do this. I have
talked to the school and begged for help and all they said is give her medication. She is not hyper but
cannot focus, daydreams, no self esteem, very disorganized and is doing terrible in school. She is
getting an A in spelling, B in reading (she can read well but if I ask her to tell me what she just
ready, she doesn't have a clue) and D's in everything else. I try to work with her with her on her
school papers she brings home but she just doesn't get it. We worked on a paper last night with 10
problems regarding telling time . She really does not get it. Math and time are alot alike and she just
doesn't get it. She went to bed crying and holding her head saying "what is wrong with
me and why am I so stupid"? It was so hard to go to work today because I just wanted to stay home
with her and tell her how much I love her. I wish I could just quit work and home school her but I am the
primary insurance person for our family. My husband works 6 days a week and only gets Sunday's
off. I have asked for help from everyone (her school, counselors, doctor, my sons speech therapist, family,
friends, my husband) and know one seems to have time to help. I am ready to admit myself in a hospital
because I am going crazy. My children are my life and I am such a failure as her mother because I cannot
help her. I work full time, work with my son (autism) all the time, try to work with my daughter, sale avon
for extra money, help with my daughter girl scout troop and do mostly all the house work (laundry,
cleaning, shopping etc.) and I can't do it anymore. Sometimes I think she would be better off with
someone else who can help her more but I love her so much that I don't what I would do if I did not have
her in my life. My husband is all talk he just says he will help and never does nothing. I do not want to
fight with him anymore because he will never change. He does love his kids but has not energy to do
anything except work. I pray every night for the strength to keeping because I am getting so weak and
am hitting all dead ends. Without my children I have no life but right now with me they have no life. What
do I do?

Kat

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