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Posted by Mary on February 08, 2000 at 10:16:41:

In Reply to: Little sis with ADD - wants me to hurt her... posted by MJ on February 08, 2000 at 05:15:43:

: Hi. I'm 21 and 5 years ago my parents adopted 3 little kids. They had all been very badly abused - sexually, physically, emotionally.
: One of them is now 9 years old and has been diagnosed with ADD.
: I love her a lot and she looks up to me, and I know she cares what I think about her, but if I even become a little annoyed with her, she can sense it and tries compulsively to make me more and more angry at her.
: I'm pretty sure that for some reason she wants me to be angry at her, she is trying to make me hurt her.

: That is what I am most concerned about - this desire for me to hurt her.

: I'm not going to hurt her, don't worry.
: But the question is, do any of you know if this is a symptom of ADD, or if it is solely a result of past abuse?
: My mom read some stuff about being "oppositional-defiant", as a symptom of ADD
: But I would rather ask real people who may have experienced this.
: Is this a part of ADD, and if so is there anything I can do to help her?
: The desire to be hurt is going to be so dangerous when she gets older.
: What is the best way to react?

: Thanks for any advice or info you could give.
: MJ

Oppositional-defiant is not a symptom of ADD as it is a problem all by itself that is addressed separately from ADD. ADD is simply attenion defecit which pretty much means you have a hard time staying on task. You quite often have poor small muscle coordination with it and maybe poor large muscle coordination but actual behavior problems usually indicate ADHD or some other added problem in addition to ADD. Hope this helps clear things up a bit.

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