Posted by Matt
on February 08, 2000 at 15:23:06:
For nearly two or three years I have been going through phases of depression. Sometimes I get extremely sleepy and other times I can't sleep. It is very strange that sometimes it causes me to laugh about the whole thing. At times I don't care for my own life but I have never attempted suicide(that's a plus). I am finding it hard to concentrate in school and my grades have dropped quite a bit, even though I am a very intelligent person capable of making straight A's. I randomly get a sickly feeling and feel like crying for no reason and just want to be by myself for hours at a time. I'v been on the internet for quite a while and have been talking to people who experience similar things and were put on medication. I find myself being happy only when I drink or do drugs. I'm a casual and responsible drinker and never overdo it. It seems to be the most helpful thing when I am depressed. I smoke pot every few weeks for the same reason. I'm just a bit concerned that I have to resort to this just to keep myself from feeling completely down and hopeless(Please note that I did not drink or do any drugs before this problem arose). I have never spoken to a doctor or psychiatrist about this or even my parents. My parents would think I am full of crap if I brought up the subject. Any suggestions or comments are welcome.