Posted by Bob
on November 05, 2000 at 11:08:24:
In Reply to: pot addiction again posted by Tina on November 04, 2000 at 01:03:02:
: Thanks to all who posted to my previous post. I really was angry earlier, however, now I am sad. It has been this way for years. First trying to find a solution to my husband's pot addiction,then being sad because I know there isn't anything that I can do, and then kinda just ignoring it till the next time. Here it is almost one o'clock in the morning and my darling husband is sound asleep because he had his joint before bed and where am I? Sitting at a computer crying my eyes out for the millionth time because I am sexually frustrated and know he will never quit smoking. I originally found this board because he told me this week (for the 100th time) that he was going to quit smoking. And for the 100th time, I believed him. At this point, I get as mad at myself as I do at him. Supposedly it really bothers him that our daughter is upset about his pot smoking and he wants to quit. However, when I mentioned that I had found this board and suggested he talk to someone who has been there he flipped out. He said that he didn't want to talk to anyone about it, that it really isn't something he wants to do, but something that he has to do. Well when he said that, I knew that this was just more of the same BS as always. I went back and read some more of the posts and came across a few that really struck a nerve. He loves pot more than me, and he will never quit unless he WANTS to. I've tried everything from threatening to leaving to kicking him out to just accepting it. Surprise...nothings changed. Guess it is time to move on.
Just read your latest posts and you have my sympathy!! Just as i would not want to live with someone who is drunk all the time, the same would apply to being stoned all the time.
It sounds like your husband knows that he should not be smoking but has closed his mind to the subject of quiting. If he won't even read a few posts on the computer - he has closed his mind.
If he is truly worried about what his daughter thinks, and she sounds like a smart little girl) have you sat the 3 of you down and discussed it? Or if you have done that does he just say 'yeah okay I will quit' and not mean it??
I am assuming that you love him and want to keep your family together. If you are threatening to leave, please make sure that you can stay away at least long enough for him to realize that you are not kidding. The threat to leave means nothing to him if he thinks that you are bluffing.
Could you get a referal from your Dr. to an addiction specialist? Would your husband go with you? If he is hell bent on using no matter what you do it isn't going to change him. Then you have to decide what is best for your daughter and yourself.