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Posted by alan zykofsky on October 31, 2000 at 03:08:01:

hi kevin, i know exactly how you feel. the pain musst be eating you up o the inside. i know it odes that to me. i want to ask oy u this the fusion you are thinking of hhavingis there major bone to bone damage, or disc problems? my neurosurgeon was explaining to me that since i have no major bone to bone damage a fusion is not the way to go. he said that it would not be stable and tere would be a good chance it would not work. i am trying to get a dorsal column stimulator, ever hear of it? i have permanent nevere damage. my neurosurgeon calls it battered nerve syndome. i also had 4 opeations on my back 2 majors one and 2 minor on my l3,l4,andl5.i haave no hardware in my back which is a small miracle.
i know this pain is torture, ican't work,and i have up keepwith my licenses that i can't afford and i worry as well.also, my girlfriend and i have to move closer to her work, because she travels almost 4 hours a day to get work and back home. i can barely get a round most of time. the reason i am able to tolerate anything at all is the pain med i am on now which helps some when i take enough dose of it. i am on ms contin 100 mg. i take 200-to 4000 mg a day. i was on oxycontin 60 mg 4 times ady, but the ms contin is better i find.the dr who preecribed it tells me it is a higher concentration o f morphine. i suggest trying the ms contin. iwas one muscle relaxers,and all kinds or pain meds. ialso tried those lidocane patches, and did nothing. i herad of a new patch call durgaisec=thy are morphine based you might want to try those. theproblem with the patches i find iss that the medication does not penetrate far enough so they work limitedly.
i can't imagine how you can work. i know thatpain and suffeing makes it impossible todo anything. i know all ido 95% of time is lie in bed.i know you have big worries with a son and all and you need to support him and yourself as well, but try not to put extra stress on yourself it just adds to the phyisccal pain. the mental pain is just as bad. i am looking into meditation again it is away of reducing stress.
i would just tell your doctor listen i am in chronic pain all the time, and i can not function i need stronger meds. tell him this is not what you choice to do, but this wht you need. also, tell him you know that living on pain meds is not the best for your health and liver, but until they straighten you ot you need them. if they fails i suggest finding another doctor to give you your pain meds. my neurosurgeon is not big on pain meds, so iw ent to my family dr andhe gave me the heavy stuff, and tommorrow i am seeing a new pain amangae ment guy. iwill get extra pain coverage event hough i don't want totakealot more pain meds i nedd it. i wontt ake 7 at time now, but 2 w0r 3 will do.
hang in there buddy,ii hope ididn't drag this out, but i hate to see you suffer like that. if you like you can email any time here is my email zyke@earthlink.net.
be well and hang in htere. alan

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