Re: question and want to vent
I have similar problems with the need to do the same things over and over, or to do daily rituals, so I do understand what you are going through.
If by any chance you are a college student, most schools have some kind of free health center for their students, and some also provide free prescriptions.
If not you may want to look for a support group that way it won't cost you money but you can at least go and vent and talk to others in a group setting which may not be as good as the medication but at least it will be something. Good luck to you.