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Old 09-07-2005, 08:20 PM   #11
chocolatesprinkle chocolatesprinkle is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2004
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Re: I want to cry-bulls eye

Hi Ciconner

Let me see if I can pull a few brain cells together here, and check my notes (which weren't very good ones).

Fatigue, achiness, and big time hip hurt started Monday or Tuesday, classic bull's eye showed up on Thursday, to the doctor's on Friday, started doxy 100 mg bid. The hip hurt was striking (BTW, I was bit in the groin) - it hurt to sit, I had to come home from work and lay down. I was used to coming home from work and doing step aerobics, riding my bike, hiking, whatever. It felt like flu, but not flu. I knew something was oddly wrong, different. And here's the bizarre thing, eh? Fortunately I got the bull's eye rash; lucky me. The very next Tues was 9/11. I slept through it; that is, I got up at 10:45 and the whole world had changed while I was sleeping. That was a pretty intense time, and I don't exactly remember how I felt. I did write down that I had fatigue, clamminess, chills, towards late afternoon during the last week of abx (total of 6 weeks on all). I never got back to my old self. Never was able to resume my level of physical activity. That was one of my main complaints. That and brain fog and fatigue and you know, the laundry list. I've stumbled through life now, ever since, thinking it was some failure of mine that I couldn't get back to where I was previously. Every day was a struggle to get through work and the minimal amount of stuff to make life function on a daily basis. Until last year, I knew I was in trouble and needed help. Therapy and maybe 4-5 months later, much to the urging of my 'coach' and to my chagrin, started antidepr Lexapro. And miracle of all miracles, jumpstarted my brain. My brain is functioning better. Therapy has also done some backlogged cleaning out of the cobwebs. I recommend it BTW. And now, it's time to work on the physical stuff. There was always that thought, that maybe this is related to depression. But now, the depression is better, I know the bodily stuff is not associated with it, 'cause its still there. So, I'm grateful for return of a sharper mind (better ability to think I would say, process things, the brain fog and memory failure are still present but it waxes and wanes). The brain fog has been so bad - it keeps you isolated. You're afraid to open your mouth. You can barely understand what anyone is saying. I can write well, and read better. That's different now too. I have to say before the antidepr, I couldn't put 2 brain cells together to even think about, figure out what was going on with me. Now, I'm on a mission.

Some have called it post-treatment Lyme, whatever that really means. I just don't think I ever got rid of the drat bug. And after reading Buhner's book, I can see how that can happen. That helps me understand.

Also, I was thinking about your rash, that it went away rather fast. Maybe your body handled it pronto. Wouldn't that be great?

Okay, hope this was helpful. If there's anything more you want to know, just ask!

CS