Originally Posted by crabbyroad
In my opinion, Im leaning towards anxiety on you. Reason being if depression when these "waves" hit, you go get busy like mowing as you stated, etc and got some relief. Depression would not intice somebody to do that, they would more likely put off doing things.
We are not know to one another here, so may I ask are you having financial problems, even to the fact that you're "thinking" constantly if I even need to spend money at the doctors, "I'm" causing a strain on finances?
Second, crying and being scared is normal with anxiety, its due to first, go get relief after you mowed, but then you second guess yourself, "What if Im depressed? If not "What in the world is wrong with me?", its natural questions to be asking yourself, so you feel overwhelmed about not having the answers and just want to burst out in tears at times.
Its great that you found a therapist/group to attend. They helped me tremendously. If you can take your wife with you, they had spouses,etc in our group to tell them what we are experiencing the frustrations, and lots of information that will shed some light, and they won't get overly concerned, which is causing YOU more anxiety. Since your Dad quickly seemed to hit the nail on the head so quick, were there any general anxiety problems on your paternal side of the family? Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, research is finding lots of generational anxiety/panic.
Thanks for the reply. I think the worry just keeps it coming. I found out about the high blood pressure in July and I have been on several meds since, all of this worrying me. Last Sunday I just got down all of a sudden and then started thinking it is the zoloft, which I hadn't taken since friday previous. In other words 2 days before this wave hit me. I was bowling with my little girl at a Birthday party. It just crept in. I felt like why is this happening, I am here with my wife and child and had just left church and this low feeling crept in, then I felt like I am not in control of this feeling. It comes on intensley. I got home and started crying to my wife again, about what in the world is wrong with me. I wanted to go to the hospital right then and be evaluated, because I was not me and didn't know why. I called a councelor on my insurance and she said it sounded more like anxiety. I just worry that I am having suicidal tendecies when this comes on. I don't know what it is. I don't set around thinking anything like that, But this hit so strong 2 weeks ago that I can't tell what it is. After I cried to my wife and we talked about it, the rest of the afternoon was better. I went outside and played with my daughter and we went and ate supper, and then I felt relaxed and read my Bible. Then I actually slept good Sunday night and had a great day Monday. Never felt like I did Sunday at all. Went to the dentist had my teeth cleaned, and felt like me all day. Tuesday their was a little bit ofthat feeling hanging around but Wed. almost had that intensity come over me. I don't undestand why that low feeling isn't always present either. Maybe it is a true anxiety attack. I just didn't realize you could have an attack and not get the physical symptoms, but my doctor says yes anxiety can do several different things. See, last night after I went through that episode I went to a high school ball game and felt better the whole time. I was still wondering what is wrong with me, but I didn't feel as down. Maybe I just let it get me down. I just worry about a depression. Maybe this isn't. I just feel like help, I need some help when it comes on. My regular doctor wanted me to try a bipolar med. He said the good days were throwing him off. I didn't take it. I don't have any mania or fits going on. I still haven't felt nothing like the way I felt on zoloft. I just am worried about what it is I guess more than anything. 9It comes on intensley. Thanks guys. Let me know what you think.