Re: How long does it take to feel normal?
First I'd suggest you start a new thread so we can keep up with you. If you really want to be drug free it can be done. There are lots of ways to get there - if you've read any of the threads on this board you know that there are alot of people who are clean, working on it or considering it. As I see it here are your options:
1) Continue down the path you are on - you should know that it only leads to jail, institutions or death
2) Taper & then stop
3) Cold Turkey
5) Methadone or Sub Maintenance
6) Out patient rehab and group
Any route you choose is going to take committment and hard work. You will also need support and it will be important that you cut off your sources - period. If the option to get more and go back is there I have found that it is entirely too tempting. For support you will of course have us here at healthboards - but I strongly recommend face to face support in the form of a 12 step group like Narcotcs Anonymous.
Taper and Cold Turkey are painful. The physical withdrawls are hell and there is no way to sugar coat it. It does pass. Taper helps ease these symptoms somewhat, but it is frequently very very difficult to stay on a taper plan. You must have a rock solid committment to make a taper work - for me it wasn't an option - if I had it I'd take it. My drug of choice was not Oxy - but was an opiate medication so it's similar. They say Oxy is harder and I'm grateful I haven't had to find out - mine was bad enough.
Read as many posts on the board as you can. Philster, Arememom, Buzzkiller, Tina76, valleygirl are the ones that come first to mind. Regardless of the drug of choice - the hell is the same physically and emotionally for most of us. I should warn you in all fairness that after the physical withdrawl - the emotional and the cravings were the absolute worst part for me and took the longest to get through. I looked at the physical like a bad case of the flu which is what it basically felt like. About 4 days to a week and the physical is manageable. There are over the counter medications you can take to help dull the withdrawl symptoms - like Advil, Immodium, Melatonin for sleep, hot baths, lots of fluids, etc.. You'll read alot of suggestions about this.
I mentioned Buzzkiller - he is in the middle of a taper plan for Oxy's and even if he doesn't think so he's making great progress. You might read some of his posts and responses to see what kind of support and suggestions he's gotten. It will be the same for you if you need it. We will be here.
The very first step is admitting there is a problem and figuring out that the drugs control you - not the other way around. From there anything is possible. Sounds like you are still on the fence a bit - even if you do have the desire to stop. I can tell you life is better - far better than you can imagine without chasing that high. Maybe you can remember what it was like before the drugs controlled you.
Give a shout if you need support or help. We'll be here.