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Old 12-03-2005, 10:47 AM   #1
KittenPaws KittenPaws is offline
Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 443
KittenPaws HB User
Unhappy Sleeping so much, life is passing by

I've been diagnosed with fibro, have possible lupus, seasonal affective disorder and chronic,clinical depression. These all cause fatigue as well as my medications. i DO deal with chronic fatigue, it may not be CFS, but its darn near close to it, i sleep so much i miss days and days worth of memorys, medications, fun, eating, everything. I'm so tired of being tired. Just the other day I went to bed at 8pm, woke up at 6 am, fed the cats and went to bed at 7 pm, woke up at 8 pm, went to bed at 7:30 pm, woke up at 2pm ....get the picture.... It goes on and on, its so bad i ask people where i am anymore, my own fiance cant even remember where i was yesterday, i dont even think we seen eachother for a week cuz of my sleeping!!!!

I miss spending time AWAKE, i miss LIVING, geeze i use to wish i was dead but now i want to be alive and its tearing me apart. I just want to sit here and cry. My life is being ruined by everything thats happening and i just cant get up and DO anything because i want to sleep, i have a NEED for sleep, its all i want to do, im ADDICTED TO SLEEPING. I just want to curl up in bed and close my eyes and enter a world where everything isnt real and *I* can change it if i thought hard enough and i was the special one, and i could fly and had special powers and achieve what i cant achieve now, and get married and have a wonderful life, even be a superhero fighting villans and saving the city.

My body just wants to sleep, my brain wants to shut down, and i normally just let it do what it wants...except today........because i was hungry for once.....

WHEN WILL IT END!?????????????????????????

I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Last edited by KittenPaws; 12-03-2005 at 10:51 AM.