kdaot06

It is so enlightening to hear another's story that sounds just like mine. Like you, I have maintained a normal ideal body weight for years. There was a time early in my college that I gained the "freshman fifteen" and learned about fitness and nutrition to successfully lose weight. Unfortunately, I learned so much that I almost feel imprisoned by food and body image. I sometimes feel that I suffer as much as an overweight person. A day has not gone by in my life for the last 10 years that I have not added in my head how many calories I've eaten. I wake up every day and tell myself that I will not count today, but by noon I begin to feel anxious. I'm more scared of gaining weight than dying of a terrible disease. But more than I want to be "skinny", I want to feel "normal" around my friends, family and co-workers. So I eat like everyone else does around me. And the fact I love food!! There have been days that I "punish" myself by skipping dinner because I ate too much at lunch or avoided hanging out with friends if I knew food would be there. But for the most part, I eat like anyone else. I am now in my late 20's and thinking about planning a family. It scares me to think I could bring a daughter in this world who would feel the way I do about my body, my weight and my food intake. Did you seek professional counseling to learn about this new way of thinking about food?