Re: How long until I feel better?
I'm so sorry - My Dad also died of colon cancer, and I felt that empty void/ache for him and for one more hug. I still feel it but without the rough edges after 5 yrs.
Here are a few things that have helped me:
Write him letters. Just pour out what you've been doing & how you feel.
Bring up good memories - like dancing on his feet when you were little in my case - along with how much you miss him.
A Hospice grief support group. They are free and you don't have to have even used hospice. They taught me some helpful things, plus that everybody grieves in their own way and in their own time. It helped to just be with people who were where I was.
Be on the look out for what I call "little hello's". They are the little signs that let you know that while your Dad's body may no longer be on earth, what is is that made him who is is (his soul, personality, etc) is still right here.
For me it was cardinals & dimes showing up at the oddest times/circumstances.
Grief is like a jagged rock that has dropped into the river of our life.
Over time the jagged edges become smoother as the river flows on.
Your grief & loss will never go away (ptui on people who say "you need to get past it") but it does become smoother & easier with time.
It's been 5 yrs for me - and I'm glad that my Dad is no longer in pain and that he is at peace. I look forward to seeing him again someday, but in the meantime I miss him so much sometimes that I still cry...
And that's ok.
Last edited by BetsyJean; 07-30-2006 at 02:59 PM.