Re: Question about when someone actually dies....
I am also sorry about your mom.
I was there when my mom passed last September and I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I have many regrets over the last six months of her life and thankfully that isn't one of them. To me I couldn't abandon her when she needed me most, even if she didn't really know I was there. She was my best friend and I just couldn't leave her when the time came. It is a personal choice and you will do what is best for you.
The death experience is different for everyone but most of the time it is peaceful, especially when it is expected and hospice is helping. I know it's terrifying but you will know when the time comes what to do. You will surprise yourself at how strong you can be, I know I did.
We are here for you.