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Old 03-26-2007, 12:47 PM   #3
Xant Xant is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Taunton, U.K.
Posts: 254
Xant HB User
Re: getting sick of "it will get better"

I lost my best friend about 10 years ago, she had been like a sister for me when things were very rough. I know what you feel like and no, you will never forget your husband and what he was to you and there will be always times when you still hurt from the loss. I too will tell you that it will eventually get to the point where the pain is tolerable...you will be able to look back without crying and smile at the happy times you both had.

I think the grieving porcess is different for everyone and others take longer to start feeling a bit better. If you think you are depressed (which is very possible given the circumstances), your doctor can help you.

You mentioned having faith. I also believe that those who pass on literally do just that...they go from one life to another, they may have gone from your sight, but they have not 'gone' in the sense of no longer existing and I believe we will see them again one day.

Here is a poem that comforted me at the time my friend died, I hope it might give you some comfort too.

Parable of immortality ( A ship leaves . . . )

I am standing by the seashore.
A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze
and starts for the blue ocean.
She is an object of beauty and strength,
and I stand and watch until at last she hangs like a peck of white cloud
just where the sun and sky come down to mingle with each other.
Then someone at my side says :
- 'There she goes!

Gone where?
Gone from my sight - that is all.

She is just as large in mast and hull and spar
as she was when she left my side
and just as able to bear her load of living freight
to the places of destination.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her.

And just at the moment when someone at my side says:
- 'There she goes! ',
there are other eyes watching her coming,
and other voices ready to take up the glad shout :
- 'Here she comes!'


lots of love,

Xant