Re: mentally drained
Oh, sweetie. How long have you been away from your job, can you get it back, or another one with the same employer, kinda sorta pick up where you left off?
I would THINK that you and your BIL could work something out that would help the both of you, but maybe not solve all your needs. You could still live there, and do some of the housework and help out and stuff, and have a job, too, couldn't you? And he could hire a companion for some of the time? I would think there's ways to combine your energies to make things better for all of you and not screw anyone over, if you're actually all working in good faith. Maybe he isn't. Maybe you'll need to get outta there.
Or maybe he's overwhelmed and depressed and can't see a way out that works for all of you and is just sticking his head in the sand. It might be up to you to take a stand and make things better.
It's a little late, since you've already leaped, but maybe the whole family can do a little looking NOW. And I hoep you can find a solution, hon.