Re: Where I am at
I had to work today, so that's why it's taking me so long to get back....
Good Lord! You want to talk about your worst nightmare coming true?
And guilt and manipulation.....to the extreme. I've said this before, many times before. Borderline, breeds borderline.
It gets passed down both genetically, and behaviourally.
My Mom was borderline....I know that now. So was my Grandmother...and my Aunt....I have run their behaviours by pdocs, and they agree that I am probably right.
So, you know logically, that none of this happened because of you.....your Dad obviously had a very, very bad heart. You didn't cause that...not a chance.
Sounds familiar...my Grandmother used to always yell at my Mom that she was gonna cause my Grandfather to have a heart attack....Mom lived in fear of killing her father....he did have four heart attacks. Mom didn't cause any of them....he had a bad heart. But, she was blamed for them....except the one that killed him...she was grown up, and he had alzheimers, and wandered off.
So, you were the family scapegoat....I am too. Sorry for being so cut and dried about your situation, but I think you understand. I sympathize and empathize completely, and my walls are going up.......
Nice...very nice....how to ruin a person's life in five steps or less.
I really think you need to beat this thing, and have a good life. You are obviously a very sensitive, caring person, or you would have become sociopathic....or something of that nature....but instead, you have turned it on to yourself. You might even be a Pisces....maybe Aries.
Anyway, trg....that's enough for tonight...gotta work tomorrow too....what can I say? There must be more....tell me about it...if you want.