Re: I believe i have PPD
the frantic efforts to avoid abandonment... I freak out and think my friends are mad at me because of something like if they don't answer their phone to me... I think they're mad at me...
I feel as if people don't care enough and think only of themselves. Which in most cases that is always true.
There are sudden and dramatic shifts in self-image, characterized by shifting goals, values and vocational aspirations. There may be suddent changes in opinions and plans about career, sexual identity, values and types of friends. These individuals may suddenly change from the role of a needy supplicant for help to a righteous avenger of past mistreatment. Although they usually have a self-image that is based on being bad or evil, individuals with borderline personality disorder may at times have feelings that they do not exist at all. Such experiences usually occur in situations in which the individual feels a lack of a meaningful relationship, nurturing and support. These individuals may show worse performance in unstructured work or school situations.
I keep on putting off my college education.
I'm unmotivated and can't become motivated.
My friends think i get mad about little things, they eventually got to the point where they couldn't deal with me anymore.... there was a girl that i was best friends with for 8 years and we stopped talking and i can't stand even the sight of her.. and they were there through it all with me... and helped me through it and now they turned on me and hang out with her and don't talk to me anymore. they said they need a "drama break" and i don't notice i do the things i do until after i do them. i've tried to avoid doing it at all, but i just do it. it's something i can not control. it's annoying because after it i feel dumb. this has been going on for years.
i'm left here with nothing, nothing to live for.