Re: Is this a normal experience with a dentist? I'm so confused!!! Pls help...
You are not over reacting - your reaction is quite normal to what seems to be a mis-understanding - somewhat due to your inexperience a bit - and somewhat due to poor communication between the dentists. I am wondering also if by bringing your mother the dentist did not just assume you were a "child" and subsequently did not feel the need to inform you in detail of what he was going to do as to not frighten you more than you were. You certainly have the right to request the type of filling you want and be informed of the pros and cons of each type as well as being responsible for the payment of such - insurance seldom covers the full cost of white fillings since the accepted standard is metal.
This still can be rectified by informing the dentist the next time you go of your preference for the white fillings and having them redone but bear in mind you may incur add'l fees. Going forward its important as you may now realize to ask the dentist specifics before any work is done and advise the dentist you will not pay for any unauthorized work going forward. Its your teeth and your mouth and you have the right to be fully informed of what is being done, the pros and cons of different treatments and the associated costs - so don't be afraid in the future to speak up. If you find however a dentist does not listen to you and does what he wants instead then find another dentist.