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Old 02-19-2009, 09:13 PM   #1
SweetHome SweetHome is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 194
SweetHome HB User
Question How do I help my friend?

Hello all - the title says it all

My best friend is the sole caregiver for his mother who is in advanced stages of MS. She is completely unable to walk or stand. She is on a catheter and has some mental issues.
He is the only child and has taken sole responsibility for her care.

I am very concerned for my friend. He is receiving no support from family although he has an extensive extended family network. His mother refuses any outside care from nurses or in-home help. Friends have tried to help but are soon worn out by the level of care that she needs. He is basically doing all this care on his own, emotionally, physically and financially. It is taking its toll in all aspects of his life.

I try to help with money but as these are hard times, I don't have much to give.

I know my friend is reaching the end of his rope. The idea of a nursing home is completely out of the picture. His mother is a very proud woman. The mere discussion is offensive to him.

I am so worried for him. He has no savings and no social life. His mother's condition has deteriorated over the years and continues to now. He feels that he must do this on his own and that he is able to do this on his own. I can see that he is not.

How do I talk to my friend about considering a nursing home? Or should I even try?

Last edited by SweetHome; 02-19-2009 at 09:23 PM. Reason: too many details