Aww, hugs to you. (I knew that feeling so well). I believe 'numbness' is our brains way of protecting ourselves from our feelings......... as the pain of what we endured is/was so bad. When the time is right, recovery will be possible and the 'numbness' feeling will subside. In hindsight, I now know the numbness feeling was actually dissociation I was experiencing, since childhood! and the depression I had was in fact ptsd. There is the saying - it gets worse before it gets better, by which I mean, all past events have to be worked through, not brushed aside. A very hard thing to go though, but well worth it once on the other side. Take care of yourself. Take things slowly. You will get there in the end.