VCRuth

Hi Lilly,

I am sorry to read that your feeling that bad. I am no doctor, but it does seem there must be a lot going on or something in particular to have triggered your craving to eat. I do know that depression often does cause people either to change their eating habits. for some people it's othre things. but eating is such a part of everyday life that it can be one of the first ways of dealing with difficult emotions. I would defo see ur doctor hun, obv nobody here can give a definete diagnosis or tell u what med u may or may not have to take- but food releases all sorts of things that can affect mood- and of course it depends what ur eating. if it's a lot of one particular thing, then nothing in large quantities is ever a good idea.

Also,it sounds like a catch 22. food does and can help dealing with bad feelings, but also can perpetuate depression. you have recognised the bingeing and it's understandable how frustrating this is becoming. EDs in general do that, you want to stop and sometimes the more you want it the harder it seems. But you need support, and am sure there is something out there u can take even just for a little while to help ur mood while you work through this and whatever is triggering it. If it's a feeling of energy or adrenalin or happiness your getting, try and think about how you could get that in other ways until you figure out what's causing the depression. i know it's easier said than done, but u need friends and family around you right now- and also to be treating urself in some healthy way. can u get the same release from music, a relaxing massage or something else that will have a more theraputic affect rather than a longer term negative one. It's about trying to break the cycle. I would definitely see the doctor, and remember people around you care and if they don't already know- let someone ur close to and who u trust know how ur feeling. I am no expert by any means, just someone who knows how big issues with food can become when stressed, and how much it can impact your everyday life and how you feel about yourself. I really hope for what it's worth, that some of this helps. All the best, and remember there are always people who understand and who care. Tk care hun.x