Thread: Why I get angry
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Old 09-26-2010, 08:44 PM   #1
sherriej75 sherriej75 is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Omaha, NE, USA
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Why I get angry

First I'd like to commend everyone on this message board that can admit that they have anger issues. I believe most people in this society do suffer from anger issues of some sort but most people won't admit to it or even realize that they have it. As a woman I have to say it's a myth that only men suffer from anger issues because most women I've seen let their anger out passive aggressively. As a woman I have to say that is harder to deal with sometimes than just direct anger because with direct anger you know what to expect and you usually know why the person is mad whereas with passive-aggressiveness it leaves you wondering- What the heck was that all about? I myself would have to say I suffer from anger and I let it out directly and sometimes explosively. I have so much resentment towards my husband for things that happened in the past regarding infidelity and so when I get mildly irritated by things now in the present they usually blow up into full outbursts and at times I yell and throw things and then end up crying on the floor, feeling totally helpless and wondering how I will be able to pull myself back together. I somehow do and I feel shaken for days afterwards but then things go back to normal for awhile until the next outburst. My husband is not a saint and he can be pretty controlling and dominating at times but nothing that can't just be ignored from time to time instead of me reacting to it the way I do at times. I know as a child I told myself that I would never let a man treat me the way my father treated my mother. It was if she had no identity. At home he'd tell her she was disgusting, fat, stupid, etc. and then out in public my mom would put on a smile and hang on his every word so people would think they were so happy and it used to anger me so much when people would make comments about what a good family we had. My father was dominating and controlling to me and my siblings as well. I have a lot of anger towards dominating men and I have gotten in fights out in public with any man that is being rude or a jerk. I usually get called the b word a few times but I get a few words in myself. I'm much nicer to women but their whole passive aggressiveness angers the crap out of me. I feel like "listen if you feel a certain way just say it to me now instead of having me hear about it from 5 different people." And I get angered over how I'm nice to women I work with, women out in public, etc. but it seems that my niceness is not reciprocated and I always wonder why. Some days I just feel like maybe I should be a b-word like how I see so many of them acting and so then I'd never have to be the victim of it again. But I don't do this and so then I end up being angry and wondering "Why do people not like me?"
Anyway, I'll leave it at that and digress a little more with any replies to this thread but this is a starting point.