Re: not sure where to go from here
Hi Lisa. I do know what it's like to be married to a man you love and care about but are not in love with anymore. Is that the issue with your husband? Before I got a divorce, it would hurt me when he'd want to have sex with me, and all it did was make me cry. If I do engage in such, it would have to be someone I was in love with. Sometimes people fall and then later on lose those feelings. I don't know why it happens. I wouldn't be one to give good marriage advice, I doubt. But maybe you two could try a councelor together. You've been married an awfully long time to just give up on that. And I think if something doesn't fix that, you do need to depart your ways. You can't keep yourself in a marriage you are not happy in, just to make everyone else happy. As you can see all it's doing is making you depressed. Your saying you sometimes wish your children had never been born. You need to resolve the issue somehow. Do you have someone that you'd trust babysitting the kids if you went out and got a job? You will have to learn to be somewhat financially independant if you do get a divorce. But you have to make a change somehow, you have to talk to your husband, try to figure out a way to resolve these feelings. And you shouldn't have sex with someone just because they have needs. If you don't want to do it, don't do it. And as far as the zoloft goes, sounds like a total waste of time taking it, it's more than obvious it's not helping you. You need to tell your physician this. They cannot help you unless you do. I'd say they need to try you on a different one. However, regardless of what you take, it's not going to matter unless your willing to make a life change to the thing that is hurting you so bad.