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Old 05-12-2011, 03:36 PM   #1
Austin83 Austin83 is offline
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Join Date: May 2011
Location: Florida
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Moving Past Your College Regrets

Hey everyone, first time poster here, I hope everyone here is doing well! Hopefully I can get some advice here on an issue I'm having.

The main reason for my post is mainly regarding the biggest mental obstacle that I have, college regrets. I have been able to move past the college mentality for the most part, but sometimes I start thinking about college again and I just get in a sad depressed "I should've done this, why didn't I do this" type mode. It doesn't happen often, it usually happens when I see a bunch of college students or am at an event that is catered toward college students, and by being there it puts me in that college mode again.

I work in a human resources type of position. Today I had the opportunity to pick up some OT and work our College Internship Graduation event that they have twice a year. I had a great time but it also made me kind of sad just for several reasons:

1) It reminds me of when life was simple, when all I had to do was get up, go to work/school, go to a party after work/school, and start it all over again. It reminds me when I actually had a good social life and when I didn't have to worry about bills, rent, medical issues, stuff like that.
2) It reminded me of a time a few years ago when I had no medical issues and was completely healthy (my medical issues are actually pretty minor but they are still there).
3) It brought back all of my college regrets that I have dealt with off and on since I graduated college.

It doesn't help that I also did this internship program just a few years ago so it was me getting to participate in all of this. I know that I have a "grass is greener on the other side" type attitude and that doesn't help, but the root of my issues really stem from my regret of not taking advantage of my college years.

Now I don't want to complain too much (overall I don't have a lot of regrets), my college years weren't horrible, I had friends I hung out with, I went to events, and I graduated with no debt (which today is a minor miracle), but I still feel like I missed out on so much in college. I didn't develop those lifelong friendships that many develop in college, I could've been more involved, I wish I would've joined a fraternity, I wish I would've live on or near campus, and worse of all, I was never in a decently serious relationship. Since I attended college in my hometown, I just stayed at home all 4 years to save money and I really believe that prevented me from living the "traditional" college experience that I now regret.

Whenever I see groups of college students, all of those regrets resurface and I wish I could somehow go back and redo college. I think it depresses me to know that even if I went back to college, I would be one of the "older nontraditional students) and that I only had one chance to be an 18 year college freshman and I feel like I blew it. It also doesn't help knowing that when I am around college students (like today) I am probably one of the oldest if not the oldest person around. Today was a great example, outside of the other people volunteering to work for the event, I was probably older than 95% of the people there, and it's a feeling I am still getting used to.

My biggest question for you all that maybe have gone through this is, how did you finally move beyond this stage for good? I believe that from a mental standpoint, these regrets keep me from moving on with the next stage of my life and keep part of me forever rooted in the past. I know I can only control the present, but I feel like as long as I have these regrets and stay somewhat rooted in the past, that it will prevent me from truly enjoying the present and then when I'm in my 30s I will regret my mid and late 20s and it will be an endless self destructive cycle.

If any of you all have any suggestions definitely respond, I appreciate any feedback!

Last edited by Administrator; 05-13-2011 at 05:37 AM.