too shy to orgasm :(
I started masturbating when I was really young. Like 11. Years before I got my first period (at 16). I know it's abnormal, but at least I know I can "get one."
The big problem is that I'm too shy to orgasm with my boyfriend. We've been together 5 years and we're totally committed to each other. But I feel like I'm terrible in bed (he would never tell me this, but I can kind of tell) because of it. And I get so worried about it that it's just impossible for me to relax enough! It's not because he's not doing it right, and he's being really supportive and telling me to take my time, but it's really starting to stress me out!! I faked it for awhile, but I couldn't keep lying to him and I told him. I'm worried if I can't let him get me to climax, eventually he'll get bored with me.
I recorded it on video once and he watched it. He said it was hot, but I couldn't stop crying I was so embarrassed. I have no idea why. It totally killed his mood and he just hugged me for like an hour and went home.
PLEASE PLEASE give me some tips!