I lost my dad unexpectedly 6 weeks ago from an aortic aneurysm, never having had a chance to say goodbye. He was almost 77 years old, but he was so full of life, and had so many plans, he seemed like a 30-year-old. He had no symptoms at all related to his condition. The surgeon who worked on him said he was most likely born with this condition. My mother is heartbroken and bereft because she was with him since she was 15. Foolishly, I assumed that he'd be around forever. I realize that 77 years old is a pretty long life, but it doesn't make the loss any easier.
People have said that in time, the pain gets better. I'm curious how people who have lost a parent or close loved one deal with this horror. It feels unreal to me that for 40 years, he was my father, mentor and friend, and now I don't have him anymore. I hate not having a father, and I hate to see my mom so sad. I feel responsible for her, even though she doesn't want me to feel this way. I look forward to going to bed at night now, so that I can go to sleep and give my brain a break from the horror that keeps replaying in my head.