I think it sounds like you are going through the normal grieving process. You don't have to cry to grieve. Your father hasn't even been gone a year yet. Give yourself and your Mom time. I think it's great that you "talk" with your Dad and honor him by listening to music he loved. It's all part of dealing with a loss of a loved one. He's watching over you and sees what is happening with his family. I agree that you will see him and all of those that precede us and in the meantime get on with your life and make him proud.