Re: Relapsed, thinking suboxone is my only hope.
vacation... that sucks, but i so understand that...when i finally came to the point that i didn't want to use no more, i wanted help right then and there, and i was told that i had to come back Monday, the place i went to for help closed early that day for there Christmas party and they will reopen on Monday, or at least be open to start the process of enrolling a new patient. i was so aggravated, but it was what it was, so i went home used all weekend and started off Monday with a new attitude, and i haven't used sense then. but that's me we are all different, and deal with things differently. yes suboxen worked great for me in ct the doctors in my area don't take insurance to see suboxen patients why??? i have no clue so yes it was a money thing why i choice methadone and not returning to subs.i rather the subs. right now i have to wake up early everyday to drive 30 mins to get my methadone i should get 1 take home bottle starting next week, that means i get a day off driving there and i can sleep in yeah!!!! i haven't gotten to do that sense dec. 22nd 2011. so that's where i am at now. with subs. you get to take your pills your self at home i so wish i could do that. i fell and screwed up my knee at the end of march so pain was an issue for me that was hard to cope with, and now i'm dealing with a pretty major family issue and i must say i would love to use i would love to just check out for a while and not have to deal with all the crap and feelings i'm dealing with. in a nut shell...i'm meeting my bio-dad for the 1st time in my life, he walked away when my mom was pregnant she let him she didn't need his money and he wanted nothing to do with her or me. i have found him and my 2 twin sisters online, they new nothing about me, he has come clean to them, they now know the truth, and i am meeting him this Saturday. i am a basket case. its weird i relate my feeling to some one who just lost a loved one. you go through phases, denial, for me excitement, mad, hurt, confused, scared, ******. so as you see i so would love to use right now, i wont.....but dam talk about cravings. i'll keep in touch i'm sure come Saturday i'll have a lot to say and will need to share...thanx all!!!!!!!