It's really good that you are beginning to reach out. I am a licensed therapist and a professor of psychology, and all the research points to both counseling and antidepressant medication together as having the best outcomes for major depression. You're not alone and you don't have to live like this. There is help out there. Please do not wait. Make sure to interview the therapist to see if you he/she is a good fit for you (can she/he understand you, does she have experience in you particular situation). Good luck to you.