Yes, I am very tolerant but with limits. I do differentiate between situations based on cause. I can't be angry and upset with someone with dementia that does something because of the confusion that they can not control. They have brain damage and expecting them to react normally is like asking someone with a broken leg to walk. That would be counterproductive. I also know my reaction can escalate or deescalate the situation quickly. I am the one that can control my emotions and reactions
I am the one with the cognitive awareness and ability to change the situation.
Dee, I am so glad the Seroquil worked for your husband. Finding the right medication can change life totally. You are lucky that you found the right medication so quickly. I am happy for you both!
The buffet is a great idea!! That takes the menu out of the equation and gives him a visual to go by. Showing is so much better than telling or reading since the visual perceptions hang around longer than other abilities. Even though Mom can not walk or talk any more... she can point to a plate when offered a choice. Most of the time she will chose what I know she loves. She can still tell a shrimp (her favorite) from a piece of chicken! She also knows when they put that dessert down on the table and stops eating her meal. It is good to get him out in a situation he can still enjoy.... and it's good for you as well!