Re: Dad's cancer
I went through almost the same thing, when I was 15, my dad's cancer came back, one day he got rushed to the hospital while I was in school, and he never left. He died 2 months later, right after my 16th birthday and right before christmas and his birthday. It was the most depressing thing in the world. When we first were told he was going to die, I burst out crying in class, whenever some gave me a hug I wanted to cry, if I started to tell someone I burst out crying and it was like my tears would never run out. Eventually, you don't become "okay" with it, but in a sense you do. It'll still be the worst thing ever but you stop crying so much over the drop of a pin.
I'm not sure if your dad will be in the hospital or at home, but simply be there with him and love him are my biggest suggestions. Hold his hand, cuddle if you can, talk to him, hug him, kiss him, watch movies or football with him, reminisce (he might start to forget things at a certain point though), get him ice or drinks or food if he needs it. I held my dad's hand when was pooping (in his hospital bed in one of those tub things they use). Just spend as much time with him as possible. Take pictures of him and with him- I took a couple and I'm constantly looking at them and so glad I took them. Even take videos if you can- I watch videos of my dad all the time.
Another suggestion..make a memory box. In mine I have my dad's cologne he wore, a couple of his shirts, birthday cards from him, pictures, etcetc.
Everything I'm telling you will help you cope, even though it might sound crazy.
It sucks worse than anything and I know you feel like absolute ****, but I promise you can get through this, your stronger than you think and don't be afraid to be a mess. It's okay, I promise.