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Old 02-04-2013, 08:42 AM   #1
shahila shahila is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2012
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Can anyone give me any thought, Please?

Can you please read this and give me some thought. I will appreciate ...

This is the story of my constant fight with pain to keep my spirit up to feel better.... I v been in chronic pain in my back and hands and recently my leg for like 1 year. Until recently, 2 months ago, i tried to overcome the difficulties that this has brought to me. So mainly i tried to be positive and keep going ... Until late December that suddenly my pain became worse and i kind of felt too much pressure, specially i felt tangible pressure and pain on my brain. I prayed for relief and I just wanted to have less pain. And in my surprise, I felt i kind of switched to a different state. i became calmer and in peace with my pain, avoided many food, and had much less sleep .. Also, i felt like i couldn't ( and still cant) cry .. i browse the songs that made me sad and cry, but instead i smile even when i feel emotional pain .. I tended to relate changes in my appetite and sleep and feeling to good things. but i m becoming worried and not sure where i m heading off because some of changes are becoming extreme.. I have problems with sleep; forget about eating and other feeling. I go to sleep and get up in 2 hours and cant go back to sleep until morning that i have to go to work. My work all involves working with clients and i need to be fine and i m getting very worried. I m like this since at least new year. What is wrong with me? .. I talked to my doctor he talked to me and asked me to see him in two weeks. I got little bit better and he told me to see him again in two weeks ( that would be next week). but i m much worse now compared to last week. I am not stressed. I am more calm and when I have pain I feel just emotionless. I don't feel very sad , I might feel a little blue ( a kind of dominant feeling, but not much). Here is the only place that I write / say how I feel. This chronic pain experience made me realize I am very vulnerable and I don't have much support ..It takes me lots of energy and makes me sad to explain people how I am. I had some problem with my motivation to work, but I tried to do the work because I love my work and I feel i somehow overcame the difficulty .. I try to do things, like exercise and i m doing it regularly.

Last edited by shahila; 02-04-2013 at 03:30 PM.