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Old 02-08-2013, 08:17 AM   #5
ninamarc ninamarc is offline
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Re: Getting ready to move my mom

I just want to add that it helps if you come up with some interesting ideas to move her. Since she is already in a facility. I think she is unhappy there because everyone tells her this is a facility. In a memory unit, the staff would say this is a retirement place. We brought my late FIL one time to look at a facility which has different levels of care. He thought it was nothing interesting in terms of outing. The salelady told him it is the apartment. He just wanted to leave. That is why I don't think it does anything if you bring her to see the facility before you move her.
The thing is she has lost the cognition level to understand certain reality and this is like one of them. The facility would confuse her and the caregivers and residents may scare her. She is not happy in the current AL probably because she is confused with your reality and her reality. In a memory unit, we no longer tell the person our reality. She is in her own reality now and she won't understand what you are saying.
Just say soothing stuff to help her. Create a nice place for her in this new facility. If it is a working place, so be it. Create a fiction if you must to make her happier.
I know there was a family who told the demented elderly that the facility was his big house and he was helping the other residents.

Hugs,
Nina

Last edited by ninamarc; 02-08-2013 at 08:19 AM.

 
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