Thank you all for the quick replies!
I think I'm going to take your advice, and 'interview' new PM docs. I was kind of already thinking I was going to go that route, but I feel a little more comfortable now that I know some of you have tried and were successful. I just want to get back to a life with some normalcy. It sucks that I cant even do the stuff I'd like to be doing with ny daughter (shes 7). I know my life wont ever be what it was 10 years ago, but not being able to function isnt an option either. Its 1am, and I dont see any sleep for me tonight.
Thanks again everyone.