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Old 03-09-2013, 03:18 PM   #4
growagourd growagourd is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: San Diego California
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Re: I never want to go out- am I depressed? My partner still goes out loads- never se

First of all, I must say how proud I am of you for all your accomplishments this far..Quite impressive!

I think the previous posters have given you some great support, and I agree with their advice. Lenvegas really pointed out something interesting about the alcohol and drug use being such a draw to him.

The fact that he does not work in winter, and has not found any worthwhile things to do with his time except party all night with his buddies. There is no future in that. I would not feel badly about not going out with him for the reasons you explain. You must be exhausted by Friday and need the weekend to rest and prepare for the week ahead. I would seriously question your boyfriends choice to take off in your only time at home. I would try and use that time to enjoy yourself in your own way.

I cant get away from the fact that he is choosing not to work in the winter. There are always other jobs for those willing to work, and if he is instead creating problems with finances and his ability to commit to a future with you, I would start moving your heart away from him. There are always people that do not want to work for their future, and they will reap what they sow, which in this case is nothing. I dont blame you for not wanting to hang out with others who have all the time in the world to simply drink and party.

Do you have girlfriends that you could make weekend plans with? Or family maybe? I hate to hear of you crying over this man who has so little concern over your happiness, and holds his own so highly.

You are on the track for a wonderful fulfilling life. You will be a great catch for a man with similar interests and high goals like you do. This might not be now, or even in the next few years, but it will come when the time is right..

Although you do have a history with your boyfriend, it does not mean you must make a future out of it.

About the possible depression, you could be experiencing some situational depression over this relationship. I bet if you can change you feelings toward this man, you could be so much happier. If you need some help in the mean time, just speak to your doctor for some temporary help to get through this. There is no need to suffer.

I wish the very best to you, please let us know how it goes from here.