| | Battling with my fear, succeeded at first, now is back.
I have battled with rabies hypochondria in the past. It has plagued me several times in the past, leading me to beg my parents to go to the doctor's and them telling me I had nothing to worry about/they couldn't give me shots due to the history I told them. I finally had gotten over it and was living life normally until this happened:
Today I was walking in an extremely dark hallway in an outdoor pool bathroom. It was pitch dark. I didn't hear anything or fell anything bite me but I'm scared a rabid/grounded bat could have bit me when I went to put up a medicine ball onto it's rack. The ground of the hallway is full of mats and I was barefoot and I'm not sure if one could have bitten me. They say that bat bites cannot be felt or seen because they are so small. I swam immediately afterwards and as rabies incubation period is longer the further bitten from the brain (the foot is the farthest) and how much was injected (swimming could have killed most of it but not all so the amount would be little). This means that if it did bite me then the incubation period will be around a year. I don't want to live in this fear for a year. I'm afraid I will develop rabies and this fear is taking over my life.
I can no longer concentrate in my classes, I've become colder towards my friends, and I developed an attitude that "I'm going to die soon so why bother/plan for the future/live life happily". I cannot get professional help because I don't have money and when i talk to my parents for help they just laugh at my fear of rabies.
What should I do? How can I cope with this?!