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Old 01-22-2007, 07:56 PM   #1
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Son abused in group home = broken ribs

M 24 year-old son with autism was abused in his group home and suffered eight broken ribs. He is now living at home (has been since before Christmas).

I never thought it would happen to my child. We are heartbroken, stressed, angry, and feeling very hopeless about the future. I don't know if I can ever trust anybody with him again.

He is non-verbal and the police and state agencies investigating don't hold much hope for finding the perpetrator. They have encouraged us to seek civil action. My son wasn't the only one abused in the home, but his injuries were the most severe.

Just venting tonight. Some days are harder than others. This past year has been a nightmare for him - long story. sigh.

Now we are dealing with a new psychiatrist who is weaning him off of some meds. and this has lead to behavior problems. I think I will make that another post because I have questions on the meds.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Debbie

 
Old 01-22-2007, 09:20 PM   #2
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

I just wanted to welcome you to the boards and tell you I am so sorry. I can only imagine what you and your family must be going through. I am sorry I don't have any advice but I want you to know my thoughts and prayers are with you.

 
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Old 01-23-2007, 03:40 AM   #3
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

I am so so sorry for what happened to your son, my son is 18 and will be moving into a supported living home next year,but he can talk and he is a big kid,let me tell you not all group homes are like that,but i would tell the other parents,and i would make sure that the licesure board knows about the abuse,i don't blame you for not trusting anyone it will take time for you all to heal, i will keep you in my prayers.

 
Old 01-23-2007, 05:24 AM   #4
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

Thank you BetsyAnn and Marissamo! All prayers are welcome.

He was having nightmares when he first came home but at least those have stopped. He has reverted back to bedwetting which we haven't seen in years.

Debbie

 
Old 01-25-2007, 12:25 PM   #5
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

Debbie,

I'm sure he is glad to be home with you. That should help the healing process along.


I do have a questions for you if you don't mind. Did your son's support from the school district change to the State providing support after he turned 18?
I'm curious about how that all works. I often hear parents say that their child doesn't receive anything once they turn 18.
Thanks
Michelle (Kolby's Mom)
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Old 01-25-2007, 12:28 PM   #6
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

I'm so sorry for what your son had to go thru. That's really terrible. Although he is non-verbal, can he identify someone thru pictures or in person? The person responsible for this needs to be punished. Please talk to a lawyer and see if there is anyway your son could "point out" somehow who did this to him.

 
Old 01-26-2007, 05:53 AM   #7
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kolby View Post
I do have a questions for you if you don't mind. Did your son's support from the school district change to the State providing support after he turned 18?
I'm curious about how that all works. I often hear parents say that their child doesn't receive anything once they turn 18
I know the answer to this one as my son just turned 18 this fall. In the United States, children who have an IEP should recieve services from the school district until the age of 21. Once they are in those years between High School and 21, the programming focus usually changes to what they call transitional programming. The transitional programming usually is focused on the education the young adult will need to fuction as independently as possible and involves things like life skills (anything from how to wash dishes to how to balance a check book) and vocational skills. Some school districts try to get out of this obligation by "graduating" the child at 18. Don't let them get away with it. For reference, the law that provides for all this is called the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA).
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Old 01-26-2007, 12:54 PM   #8
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

Thank you everyone for your prayers and concern. He is doing very well and I am enjoying my time with him. Even if I am a little tired. Somehow I don't have the energy I did in my early 30s.

Kolby, you were given the correct information on the age limit for educational services. However, you do have the right to other vocational or training services. Byron has attended day training programs to help him continue to learn daily life skills.

 
Old 01-26-2007, 11:37 PM   #9
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

I am so sorry to hear that they did this to your son. I would get me a lawyer and see what can be done about that. Nobody should be done that way.

God Bless You All!

 
Old 02-06-2007, 10:20 AM   #10
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

We do have an attorney! Also, we are working with the local police. I have a "gut" feeling and there has been an anyomous tip sent in so we are looking at that. My son has a bad reaction to one of those employees.

Even if he pointed and said "hurt" it would be difficult to convict unless there is a witness. He also can't always answer "on command." I know, the legal system sucks.

 
Old 02-06-2007, 04:26 PM   #11
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Re: Son abused in group home = broken ribs

it breaks my heart to here these types of stories. i have a mentally disabled cousin who has lived in a group home for the past 5 years. her parents had to seek out a home for her as she became too difficult for them to handle. everytime i see her, i feel as if she is getting worse. i don't know if it is the meds they have her on but the last time i saw her i couldn't believe how badly she looked. i feel that she is also suffering some type of abuse where she lives because when she comes home (every weekend) she has a new bruise. when my aunt calls the home about it they always say my cousin instigated a fight and that all they did was restrain her. yeah right, "restrain". i feel a special connection to this cousin because we share the same birthday. i just don't understand how people have it in them to hurt helpless people.

well, i'm signing off now......i feel a really good cry coming on.

 
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