New to this board....memories of childhood returning

[SherryAnne]

Hi, I am new to this board. I have decided to post here because I received so much support from the Lung Cancer and Death & Dying boards a few years ago. It is what actually kept me sane during the difficult time when my mother was dying.

I am writing today because after a year of therapy, I have have been questioning why I cannot remember most of my childhood. I am finally starting to find out why. I have been having fuzzy memories of childhood sexual abuse by my brother and an uncle. I am just shocked right now. But it's starting to become clear to me why I am the person I've become today. I am scared and very confused right now as the memories are coming back in bits and pieces.
I just need to remember.....but can't put all the pieces together yet.

I am hoping to maybe find some insight of others in the same situation and any support that is out there.

[jennybyc]

Keep up with the therapy. You will remember only if you feel safe. The psyche releases only as much as you can handle so there's a reason why it is slow. If everything got dumped on you at once, you might not be able to handle it.

I had repressed memories and didn't start to remember until I was 35. Your mind is protecting you from what you can't handle and now that you are older and able to cope, it will give you what you can handle. Our brains are very smart.

So stay in therapy and if you want, join a group that deals with sexual abuse so you learn more about it...why it happens and how to look at it. Remember, you did nothing wrong.

Safety is the key. If you don't feel safe, the memories will stop. Obviously you do feel safe with this therapist so keep up the good work. It's hard but so worthwhile.

gentle hugs..............Jenny

[SherryAnne]

Thank you for your kind words......and yes, I will stay in therapy. I know that it's going to take time for me to process and heal from all this information. I have a long road ahead of me.