I have been with my boyfriend for over 4 years and we have lived together ever since. When we met we both liked to drink together and have fun, but now it has gotten worse. There was a time in the past when we were drunk and I slapped him and he choked me. I had a restraining order put on him, but he cried and became depressed I felt bad so I went back to him.
We constantly fight and bicker, and he thinks it is not a big deal. He has anger issues, abuses alcohol, drugs, he is nasty, racist, and has a gambling problem as well. Because of drugs and alcohol he becomes mean, he screams all the time,
bangs on the table, and smokes a ton of cigarettes. He might be the worst person EVER. He doesn't yell at ME all the time, he usually yells because of a gambling loss. You would ask, "why are you with him?" and I answer...because I love him, he has a good heart at times, we share interests, and he might have potential.
He wants to do so much with me in life, but we haven't done anything in months besides drink! He drinks everyday and thinks he doesn't have a drinking problem. I am scared to leave. I want to help him. I always think he is going to change, but now I am aware he will not. We are getting married in September, our family and we have spent a lot of money already for the wedding, we even sent out invitations. Now I am scared of him. I lock myself in the bedroom sometimes and he breaks in. After yelling for a while he comes in and tries to hug and kiss me like NOTHING HAPPENED and then asks me WHAT'S WRONG? Help!
I want him to get better he might be sick. He made me become depressed with high anxiety and gives me panic attacks. I even have chest pains. The other day he forced me to drive somewhere at 3am and we got into a bad accident. None of us were seriously injured, but now I need to get better and to stop doing any drugs or drinking because I am grateful for my life.
He seemed to get over the accident quickly, he drank a whole bottle of vodka today and won't stop yelling at the TV (sports). I need a lot of advise, not to leave him (which is obvious) but how he can get better.
My plan is to stop drinking so he has no one to drink with and maybe he will cut down? I don't know.