Hi. I'm new here. I'm glad to find this site. I think it's better to talk to others who have been through similiar experiences. Just a bit of my background. We had a neighbor when I was growing up that tortured and killed any animals we had. He would shoot at our house and blow out our windows. Cops never did anything about it because they couldn't prove it. They caught a trailor that was next to our house that we were going to use to get away, on fire. It caught my room on fire. I was about eight.
I was verbally and physically abused by my mother growing up. Even now she is negative and bitter.
I was abducted when I was twenty and thank God I was never raped. I got away immediatley but it was very tramatizing.
I married an alcoholic who used to shove me while pg, choked me, punched me in the eye once and sprained my wrist, pinched me in between the garage and his vehicle. I've seen emptiness in his eyes where he would kill me. (Divorced)
My question is..every night I have nightmares. Usually someone is going to kill someone else and I'm in thier body. Or it's me and I'm being abused. Sometimes I don't know what I am dreaming. My boyfriend wakes me up nightly telling me I'm screaming again. I'll scream help help help.
I take klonopin and a muscle relaxer at night when I sleep. I'm also on Lexapro for the stress and anxiety. I'm 39 so I've had these for almost thirty years. I can't get them to go away. I've talked to counselors, I go to church. I have a strong faith in God.
Anyone else going through this?
The following 2 users give hugs of support to: walkingtall Jaby (06-18-2011), Phoenix (07-14-2011)