Re: I desperately need help with my abusive relationship
I appreciate you taking the time to reply to me. It has been very difficult because I am only 25 and on my own... I don't really have anyone. I am certainly not trying to throw a pity party for myself and I have been trying to remain as strong as I can.
To be honest, I think I did suffer a nervous breakdown. I ended having to go to the doctor to get a sedative because of the stress and confusion I have been feeling. It is helping me think more clearly and making me realize a lot.
What really broke me down was that within just this past week or so, and I know this is going to make you sick, we were sexually active. I realized what a terrible mistake this was because he went right back to his up and down behavior. Well, long story short, throughout the whole week he was calling me only to talk about things that didn't even make any sense. Last Saturday night he phoned me 13 times while I was sleeping. He sent me a message telling me he was ending his life and he was so lonely etc. Throughout the week I tried to avoid the calls... sometimes they were friendly, other times I would get messages from him telling me how I ruined his life. Please keep in mind that at this point I don't even bother to yell or fight back, he mainly does all of the talking. So then this weekend he called me from a strip club very intoxicated, just provoking responses. I will admit, I become desperate and confused at times and call him, but lately that behavior has stopped. Then on Sunday we had a lot of negative words back and forth. I basically told him off and told him that he was no good and that I deserved better. Well, he actually changed his phone number and told me that he is dating someone else. He told ME that I need to move on, etc.. All of this behavior and treatment from him has honestly confused to the point of questioning my own sanity. It doesn't make any sense.
"He told me that I need to start with someone new and pretend to be sane like he is doing." Those were his exact words. It doesn't even make sense to me.
For some reason this made me lose it. I don't truly believe that he is seeing someone else. I know he said it just to hurt me. I also feel like he did this as a way to get a reaction out of me, I guess it worked. He is aware that I am moving and I will not give him the address. I feel that this may be a tactic of his for me to breakdown and give him the address.
I will NOT give him the address.
Please, if you have any insight, I would appreciate a response. I know all of this just sounds mental.