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Old 12-28-2008, 09:52 PM   #1
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Unhappy Losing friends cause of this.

so i am really having another down night. Since i have gotten really sick this summer my friends are getting slimmer and slimmer. People ask me how im doing. I wish i could honestly tell them im happy and doing fine. But in reality im terrified of everything happening. I only have one friend who understands that i really am sick and that if im complaining, i just need someone to give me a hug and just listen. How do you guys stay so strong? I try. i have tried to stop complaining and try to just be chippy all the time but thats not me and im tierd of lieing. I am in high school and i know most of them just want to party but i dont understand why known of them can even show true emotion for me.

Just need to get this off my chest and i know on here i wont be "the complainer" when im just saying how i feel. I have lost most of my hope. I want it back.

 
Old 12-28-2008, 10:11 PM   #2
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Hi Em55! First of all Big Hugs from me!! You aren't alone. Do you have acid reflux trouble too? I feel like you do to. This is the only place I can come to and vent. People understand me here. You can talk to us here anytime.

I feel like I am pushing people away from me who don't understand acid reflux or anxiety disorder. It's all very real. You can share your heart here in trust us.

 
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Old 12-28-2008, 10:57 PM   #3
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Thanks! that is why i joined. I havent been diagnosed yet, a tech that was testing me for asthma said he thought i might have a hiatal hernia or a growth in my chest on top of acid reflex. How you said about pushing people away,, that is what im doing. I just want my friends to listen, not argue, and say what they are really thinking. I have pretty much lost two really good friends within the last two days. Im just scared and they dont understand.

Thanks again

 
Old 12-29-2008, 06:44 AM   #4
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Hi Em! Well you have us to talk to. We understand because we are going through the same things. Even though we are all different ages, we have a common bond. We really understand. I understand your fears. I have been feeling rotten all during the holidays. I am waiting for a call from my doctor to have my endoscopy scheduled. I have never had an procedure done before so you can see why I am very nervous. I just keep praying, and have people praying for me. I wish I dealt with physical problems better but I tend to think the worst. Maybe it's because of too many bad TV shows. Thats why I try not to watch the doctor shows.

I hope you are feeling better today. I am sorry about those 2 friends. It's a shame that they can't be more understanding. I hope they will be. Maybe things will change. Hang in there!

 
Old 12-29-2008, 09:11 AM   #5
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Thank you! I will pray for you that your endoscopy will go fine and you wont feel it! Happy holidays!

 
Old 12-29-2008, 01:21 PM   #6
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Thanks Em55. It is scheduled for Jan. 9th. I just found out a bit ago. I pray God will help me be calm and that I won't die from the sedation. I have never been sedated or put under. This is just a part way semi'awake thing they say. I think she said they will use demerol. I did have a bit of that during my labor with my first daughter years ago. I seemed to be fine then. So I shouldn't have a reaction to it now. I hope. Eeh gads! I just want this over!

 
Old 12-29-2008, 02:49 PM   #7
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Your welcome! Im sure you will be fine,, if i have to get one done i will be a nervous wreck. I am young and i have been pretty healthy my whole life. I dont even get shots, so are they giving you any IV's??

For my breathing test for asthma that i took a few days ago,, they wanted to take a blood gas test which involved a needle into my wrist, and i have arthitis(yess i am 15 and way to young to have all of this sstuuff!) and i had to refuse because they wouldnt even let my dad come back with me while they did it!

So are you going to be half awake during the endoscopy,, An old friend last year at school had to get one done and she said she was asleep the whole time and woke up in recovery. I hope thats what they will do with me!! Is this your first test you are having done for the reflex?

 
Old 12-29-2008, 04:49 PM   #8
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Hi Em! Yes, this is my very first test for reflux. I have never been officially diagnosed with it. I know I have had it off and on for years. I am now 44 and have two grown daughters that are 19 and 21.

The lady on the phone said I would be sedated with dimeral. I would not be put completey under. Thank God! I am scared. I have never had a procedure or a surgery. So I guess that would explain some of my anxiety. But I also have anxiety disorder so this sets it off.

I also suffer from IBS from time to time so actually thought while they have me knocked out maybe they want to look up the other end and do a colonoscopy. LOL! But maybe not! I just want it all over with and to find the relief I need.

I can't help but think our problems are caused from stress. I really feel for you honey. With your parents situation...these are things you should never have to deal with. Our world it changing and times are tough. But you shouldn't have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. You will be ok! I sure pray alot!! We may lose our house due to the economy but I know the Lord will always take care of me. And you too! So try to cast your cares on Him!!

Let me know how you are! I enjoy talking to you!

 
Old 12-29-2008, 05:20 PM   #9
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

Hi,, Okay. I am hoping i will only have to do one tests and not different ones. I live outside of a small city, the hospital here doesnt do any type of hard procedures. That will be a strain on our money for me to go down south to get one done but we thankfully do have medical so that part will be covered.

what is IBS? I know that a lot of my problems have been from stress. Our house almost got burned down twice by wild fires and that is when i got really sick and i have since. My coaches could tell (which i thought was pathetic) that it was too much stress and why to unhealthy for me to be trying to play. That was a reality check for me that it was showing.

Zantac has helped me incredibly. My chest pain is not as bad on it. My cough which was really bad never ending, finally isnt that bad. I still cough a few times a day but nothing compared to before. I am taking it twice a day. There are home brands which are cheaper and work just the same except the persciption home brand was making me sick.

I know my parents will make everything work out fine. They always have. I know i will have a house, my grandma and uncle paid it off for us when they tried to forclose us last year.
Good luck.

 
Old 12-29-2008, 05:43 PM   #10
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

No wonder you have felt bad. The house nearly burning down and the foreclosure part. That was nice of your grandparents to step up and help out. I don't have access to any help for ours I am afraid. But that's ok. It's just a house. We can live somewhere else when the times comes. I know most likely foreclosure is inevitable. We will survive. We are survivers. But it does stress any normal person out. Wether we like it or not.

You are so young! I hate to see you go through this. I just want to see you happy and healthy and doing all the fun things a 15 year old should be doing like playing your sports. I know you will get better! You are young and healthy. You have all that on your side!

IBS is Irritable Bowel Syndrome. It is when one minute you can be constipated and the next have diarrhea. Not fun. Sometimes you can just feel your intestines or tummy just rumbling. It's like things don't always settle right or make it out nice and smooth. To put it politely. lol
I do hope you don't have to deal with this.

As far as the chest pain. Is that from your reflux? Or from maybe coughing so much? DO you get alot of mucus in your throat with this? That is how I know mine is bad. Just a bad post nasal dripping and mucus in my throat and then a little burning right between my breasts in the sternum area. Lately I have little twinges of pain on the upper part of my tummy. It's like sore. Can you relate to any of this?

 
Old 12-29-2008, 05:56 PM   #11
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Re: Loosing friends cause of this.

YEa i am happy 2008 is over with and new years eve will give me a little insight to how my 2009 is going to be. I think i might have anxiety issues also. I have put that on the back burner for now. I have other things to worry about lol.
Dont worry about me. I deal with it and just need at least a few of my friends to help out and stick with me. I am kinda glad i am going through this though because it is further giving me an idea of who are my true friends. Im so sorry about the ibs. I usually never have diarea but i am usually pretty constipated. I try to eat really healthy and find something to help with that but i think i am going to have to get on fiber sure or something and let the doctor know. That might have something to do with all of this going on.

My old doctor just told me it was from coughing but as im getting less coughy(lol), my chest pain still has days it is horrible. It has kept me home from school because i couldnt sleep all night it was so bad. It is right under my left breastbone and sometimes on the right or in the middle.

I do get the mucus feeling. I usually dont have mucus that i can like cough up a bunch, but always having to clear my throat. I believe it is lpr symptom but not positive. for about a week i couldnt even bare to touch my whole stamache area. It was as sore as it has ever been. Not sure if that is the same as what you were asking about but i have had days and still do when my chest is just a crimpling pain. I almost went to the hospital but decided to let time pass and see if it would get better and slowly it did.
Very wierd. not sure why that happened.

 
Old 12-30-2008, 06:22 AM   #12
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Re: Losing friends cause of this.

Hi! Ya I have days where the upper part of my stomach is just tender of sore. Just below my ribs. I am not to used to that symptom. So that makes me think...gee is this getting worse? Where all are they going to find little ulcers? I can handle that. I just don't want it to be cancer or something. But it is a pain to deal with. I was feeling so much better last night. The this morning I woke up with the relux back again. The sore feeling in there and a case of irritable bowel. What is it about night time? I just wonder if all that acid gets going and just goes up or down and wreaks havoc. I am beginning to hate mornings. Is it that way for you?

 
Old 12-30-2008, 09:43 AM   #13
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Re: Losing friends cause of this.

Mornings are for sure not the best time of day. The last week or so i have woken up with a sore throat. Hurts really bad to eat,, trying to eat some toast right now and im coughing and throat is really hurting. I thought i might be getting sick so i have been taking 12 hour decongestants on top of the zantac. I will ask the doctor tomorrow about the sore stomach area. I hope that doesnt mean it is getting worse but i know mine is. It has since last year greatly! That was my main concern that this wasnt asthma cause asthma usually doesnt progress like this. I wasnt surprised when they ran the tests and found out i didnt have asthma. Nobody knows your body better than you do.

Ulcers are usually found somewhere by the stamach i think, but could also be in the lungs or somewhere but its rare. During the endoscopy i think if they find one they will pull a sample off of it to test it and make sure there is no cancer starting or present. Do you have to like eat slowly to try and like digest the food. I have noticed expecially in the morning, it takes me about 20 minutes just to get down 3-4 pieces of toast. I live 20 minutes from my bus stop and it takes most of the way to get it all down and i sometimes feel really crappy after i eat. can u relate at all?

My grandma has some acid problems as well and she heard that if you sleep on your left side it helps the acid to stay down,, but i cant. The other morning i woke up to a sharp painful pain in my left side and i was on my left side. It was much better after i got up but it was very painful. Last night i was on my left side watching tv and had to turn over because i could feel it comming on. Im scared that that is not normal. If it is suppose to help, and helps her, why is that side so sensitive to being touched or laid on?

 
Old 12-30-2008, 11:17 AM   #14
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Re: Losing friends cause of this.

Hi Em! It's all so different throughout the day., I woke up with mucus. Ugh! But got up slowly.. had a banana and some whole grain cereal and water. Took some vitamins etc...I thought hey those stomach pains are gone, and the anxiety and depression. I felt ok....

So then I just worked out on the treadmill for a fast walk of 30 mins. I felt really good and was breathing ok. But then I stopped and got off of it...to get back on here. Then I feel like I was trying to get a full breath in. Taking big deep breaths. Ugh! The mucus is thick. Good grief! I honestly had simmered the mucus down a couple of days ago with the Prilosec. But the side effects were bad! So I quit. This is day 3 without anything.

So what do you think I should I do? I have some Zantac. Should I start it? I am afraid of side effects. Do you have side effects from it at all?

 
Old 12-30-2008, 12:12 PM   #15
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Re: Losing friends cause of this.

Hello Everyone,

I know how you all feel. I was told by my boss yesterday how "self centered" I was complaining all the time. I HATE when I do that but you would think as much as I cough and can't breath good that he would be more understanding. It's certainly not like I do it on purpose and I'm sure I drive everyone around me crazy including myself! My poor husband has learned to ignore me, thankfully. I've just stopped taking any meds for my LPR because they weren't doing me a bit of good. I'm fine as long as I sit real still and don't move but I literally can't do anything without feeling the need to sniff and cough. Sometimes to where I'm exhausted. Especially lately with all the Christmas stuff going on, eating everything (which, doesn't seem to make much difference anyway) being off schedule and not getting enough rest. I know all of my symptoms have to be reflux related since with the cold weather we've been having that there shouldn't be anything for me to be allergic too. Also, taking every allergy med under the sun doesn't make a dent. Not even the nasal meds. The feel like I'm choking every morn when I get up until I get all the mucus and crud out of my nose and throat. No burning at all. Just sniff and cough.

CharBerry

 
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