First of all, I apologize for my English (not my first language).
I have been looking through many other acne stories tread and I didn't find any that I can compare with my experience.
I have been dealing with acne since at least 15 years. I don't really have much hope anymore. I've got days that it get me very frustrated and upset. They are days I don't dare going out. The first thing people see between each other is the face and that's my worst body part.
I tried practically everything over-the-counter products. I tried 3 or 4 different kind of birth pills (which every one of them made me very nauseating) and which didn't help my acne & my PMS. I tried Tetracycline and a couple other antibiotics and prescriptions creams. Without success...
I got an appointment with a dermatologist. I had so much hope on that. First of all, she checked my skin for 2 seconds under a light and gave me a prescription. I felt really rushed... and in-and-out appointment. She practically threw me out for the next patient. I never got the chance to try to get some answers to my numerous questions and she never explained what she prescribed me. They only thing she said to me is to go back to see her after 4-6 months if there wasn't any improvement. I went to get my prescription the same day. Of course, my insurance doesn't pay anything on acne prescriptions and the bill was $150 for a month. The pharmacist started explaining to me how to use my products. Come to find out, the dermatologist had practically prescribed the same medication that I was on before I went to see her. I left the drugstore empty-handed.
The only other option at her opinion was Acutane. I read a lot about Acutane and I'm absolutely convinced to never try that medication. I work outside most of the time and there is a big warning to avoid direct sunlight with it. Along the side effects list is depression. I already have really bad PMS and feeling depress is on my list of symptoms.
Afterward I tried Burts Bee, Zenmed, Revivogen and others. The only reason why I did try those last products was because I had a money back guarantee. I can't imagine how much money I spent on acne products... and I don't think I want to know.
I completely stopped using acne products for about 1 year now. Why should I keep spending if nothing works!? I thought that maybe it would give a break to my skin. It's been so many years I kept applying harsh creams!
Since the past 2 years, I noticed that I don't just have small "normal" pimples. I've got more cystic acne... hard, big and deep inside my skin. It's bad when I can feel throbbing pain all over my face. And those ones take so long to go away.
Few years ago, I would have a little break the week after my period. Now my face never really clear up. It's constantly and just keep adding. I feel, as I will never win this battle. In good days, I say to myself:"stop being a cry baby, you've got above your head and you've got love". But unfortunately there is more bad days. I didn't think having a clear skin would be one of my biggest dreams that don’t come true. I just want to look at myself in the mirror and not only see all my pimples and a face under it... a face that I'm happy with.
Right now I'm considering acupuncture. I read it could be very beneficial to regulate hormones and help acne. I really have to push myself and be positive... It just seems that I get more and more upset with less and less hope each time that I try something new and it don’t work.
I just want a clear face... I want something called confidence!