New ADD Parent - ADD / ADHD Message Board

baabz · 10-15-2004, 07:51 AM

Hi Everyone! I'm new to the board. My youngest is our only boy and we have suspected ADD for several years. I think of ADD as just very "right brained" - usually bright kids with lots of creativity. Not an illness. Unfortunately, they are just too bright and creative for their own good!

My son does theater (most ADD kids are great with acting!), and is almost always involved in a play. This has kept his self-esteem high. However, he struggles with peers at school because he just tries too hard and they think he is weird. He can't stay organized even though he's really trying hard. He is slipping in his grades, from A's and B's to C's.

He talks almost non-stop, and has never been able to sit through a meal.

My husband has been against meds. He is currently doing a play with our son and was told to "control his child" the other night. He is beginning to see that our son has some issues that need to be addressed. So, the school is doing an assessment on him on Monday. His teacher is great! She has been so supportive. Last year's teacher was a nightmare!

Reading about meds scare me, and when I talked to our son about it (he is 11), he tearfully said, "Don't you like who I am? Why do you want to change me?" It broke my heart! I'm so struggling with the meds thing, but feel that he needs to at least try it and see if it helps him stay focused. He also has an anger issue (not at school, but at home) and has for years. I read on here that several of these meds have caused aggression. That's the last thing he needs!

I would love to hear about your experiances with meds and what has worked for your kids. I know some of you are against meds, and I totally understand that. I'm sitting on the fence right now. My nephew was on meds and it helped him tremendously. My brother never got help and is a mess today at the age of 45. I've had the same pediatrician for 14 years, and I totally trust her judgement on this. I think I just need to give this a try and stay open minded.

Thanks for putting up with my jibber-jabber!

index.html · 10-15-2004, 12:44 PM

Hi baabz,

I'm afraid I don't have much advice for you, but I did want to say "welcome to the board".

It's so hard to know what is the right thing to do for our kids. It will be interesting to hear what the school assessment shows. Does your school have an actual PhD psychologist doing the testing or is a "diagnostician" like our school uses? In any case, my advise would be (as it always is) to trust your instincts. You, as his mom, know your child better than anyone else on the earth!

Let us know what you decide!

janree · 10-17-2004, 09:51 PM

All I can say is do your homework. There are support groups. Do not rush into medication.

Z'sMom · 10-20-2004, 01:07 PM

Welcome.

Our story - bright, articulate child who was diagnosed 8 years ago and only recently went on Adderall (min. dosage). Our approach has always been to teach Z coping mechanisms & self-control tools to recognize & manage his own behavior.

I know where you're coming from on the meds and what "stigma" it carries for your child in his own eyes. Our experience, thus far, with the meds is that they allow him to BE himself, more easily, more often, with less difficulty overall.

Do you have a behavorial therapist that your son works with? They are WONDERFUL in helping to teach him to recognize when he's just a bit "over the top", as well as in teaching parents how to best help your child.

Good luck with the school assessment!

hummingbirdkiss · 10-20-2004, 11:05 PM

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