Can someone tell me what the symptoms of ADD or ADHD are? Also if a child was on meds for this problem, does that mean his children will have this? My b/f isn't on any meds now and hasn't been sense grade school. He also feels he never should have been put on any meds. He doesn't have work related issues and he can sit threw movies, play games, read books etc without issues. He does however forget to take the trash out, or he is late on paying bills. My sister says that is just normal guy stuff lol. He can also keep friends and is well liked. I will admit I do not fully believe this condition is 100% real, but I will also admit there is no way I can really know. Any input would be appreciated. I guess what I am worried about is. Is this condition real? Is it hereditary? Do many of you how have this, have family with it as well? Does forgetting to take trash out mean you have add or adhd?
It is very unlikely your boy friend ever had ADHD.
The ADHD symptom that I present most is inattentiveness. Others perceive me as not listening when they speak, losing and forgetting things non-stop, a space cadet - I have walked away from conversations while the other person was still speaking.
I perceive ADHD as a mind in chaos. My thoughts are rapidly changing through many threads and will often lock-in on one that is irrelevant. I have some control over this because of hyperfocus. A challenging problem will trigger hyperfocus. I am sure that is why I ended up as a computer programmer and have always been self-employed.
Genetics have been implicated. Roughly 30% of ADHD children have one or both parents that have ADHD. That compares to around 10% of children without ADHD. So an ADHD parent is more likely to have ADHD children but it is by no means a sure thing.
Tracing the etiology is probably impossible in the strictest scientific sense. There are too many variables. For example, my father's side has a history of mental illness. It skipped my dad. I was the product of a hard birth. I was raised in central New Jersey, an area notorious for toxic dumps. I can remember the mosquito truck coming down our road spraying DDT and the kids playing in the fog. Which one is responsible, if any? I'll never know.
Contrary to popular opinion, ADHD can be objectively diagnossed by psychological tests. Most doctors do not insist that patients undergo testing because it is very expensive and rarely covered by insurance. Fortuneately for me, my HMO does cover it. My test results clearly document the ADHD diagnosis.
I am a guy and sometimes "accidently on purpose" I'll forget to take the garbage out. But I can always pull my "drain bamaged" card and get out of trouble.
My mother and my youngest brother had it. I have it and so do 2 of the three kids I have. Son takes Concerta but only during the school year, my daughter has never been on meds and is a senior and does well in school. Daughter has more of the 100 miles an hour, cant sit still problem, we have arranged that so long as she is not disrupting the class that she can get up and walk around or stand in the back of the class if she needs to. She is able to still hear and understand what the teacher is saying and teaching so long as the hyperactivity is addressed first and before it gets out of control. My son, he has a thousand thoughts a second, he is 10 and we still can only give him single item commands, and he still will lose track if not done immediately.
I am 40 and ADHD, I took meds for 9 years as a child. I am able now to control the attention part unless the subject is of no interest to me. If someone starts to talk randomly or runs on and on, I am out of the loop within moments. The hyper part is a great asset at work, I am required to do a lot of active work and it helps. I figure that its there, why not use it to my advantage. I usually complete twice as much work as any co worker in a day.
If you are worried about having kids and them being ADHD you had better not have kids at all. I would be more concerned about the disease and health issues that are deadly. I wear glass and I think that it is more of a disability then my ADHD.
Actually I have been double checking to make sure that I or my B/F wouldn't pass anything on to our children willingly. We have been discussing this subject a lot and he mentioned to me he was never formally diagnosed with ADD/or ADHD. He tells me as far as he knows his parents or brother did not have it. He said he had many food allergies as a child that caused his problem for a while. They were really bad. I will be looking into allergies next. I guess allergies can cause some kids to be hyper etc until there allergies are out grown or treated. At school a teacher said he may have had ADD. I guess that happens a lot to school aged kids. Sense I wasn't there I have no way of really knowing if it was allergies or another problem. I feel it is a reasonability to know what could possible be passed on to my children. Personally I feel children with behavior problems cause a strain on family life along with other things. I would never want to pass that on to a child. If I could help it. Thanks for your input, but I will be the one to decided if I have children or not.
Last edited by FairyMagick; 07-23-2005 at 08:05 PM.
If it's not in the genes it's in the behavior. The kids that are getting dianosed often have parents that didn't know that they had it all along. I'm sure there's a big chance unless you have it under control and can give the kid structure. Of course I wouldn't say it would always be a reason not to have kids.
Comeonnow how does one get diagnosed? Is there a blood test? Or some other test?
FM, I don't know how others have gotten diagnosed, and I don't know if technically I am officially diagnosed or not. The four of us (my husband, son, daughter, and I) were having family problems about 5 years back and went to a local psychologist. She singled me out during that first visit and said that I have ADD. I guess she could just tell by the way I acted. I know I zone out a lot when people are talking, and there were probably other indicators. I was content with just her saying that; at least I finally could put a label on my problems that I've been having for as long as I can remember. I just started contacting OVR (Office of Vocational Rehabilitation) several months ago and have met with a counselor twice now. He has me scheduled for neuropsychological testing next month. I know it takes up the whole 8-hr day, so that should be interesting how I'm going to manage to get through all that. :S After that I should know exactly what are my problems. I also mentioned that I'm sure I have depression; I also think I might have some form of OCD and an anxiety disorder...and who knows what else is festering inside this brain of mine. I've had so many problems over the years and wish that there'd be an answer...so far I haven't found it in medications; the ones I've been prescribed haven't helped one bit IMO. It's all very depressing thinking that I might just be this way until the day I die. Like I said, I don't know how the other people who had ADD have been diagnosed, but this is how I'm going about doing it.
I had tests done. It was an oral test so I couldn't use any of my normal tricks to get by. There was a memory test and out of a few hundred of things I could have remebered, I rememberd about 3. It was very shocking. I couldn't hold things in my heard long enough to repeat them back. I had difficult time reading the clock faces. They didn't know if it was a spatial problem or that I just lost my concentration. After the test the guy said "you must have real problems". Before this nobody could see my struggles.
FairyMagik it doesn't sound to me like your boyfriend has ADHD at all. If he does it would be so mild that it probably doesn't cause major problems so I wouldn't worry about it. I am from an adoptive family, so I don't know whether it is hereditary or not.
However, I wanted to respond because I am also at the point where Iím ready to have children. I certainly donít mean to pry into your private business, but I thought sharing my take on it might be helpful to you. My husband and I have discussed it, and the way we see it is that you canít really make the decision based on what genes you might or might not pass on, that might or might not be dominant or recessive in your children. For instance, you or your husband may pass on genes for problems that youíve never even heard of and have no idea that you're carrying. Problems that you or your husband actively struggle with (allergies for instance) have higher odds of manifesting in your children, but that doesnít mean they will. It seems a shaky ground on which to make such a big decision, at least for me.
I have a variety of problems and tendencies that I would never wish upon my children. However, they will have the advantage of a mother who is aware of what their risks are, and we can address them assertively early on and learn to manage them. What it comes down to is that despite all my problems, I know that I can raise children with a dedication to learning and a strong sense of compassion for others, and that they will have the opportunities and abilities to contribute more to the world than they take out of it. Good luck!