Teachers and your child's 'choices' - ADD / ADHD Message Board

weez · 08-03-2007, 07:59 AM

Maybe this is more of a vent than an actual question! But does anyone else find that most of their kids teachers imply that ADHD behavior is a 'choice?' For example every single teacher from K - 3rd have talked about my son's 'choices' even though they all know he's medically diagnosed as ADHD. Last year the teacher said among other things that my son was 'choosing' not to get his work done. What exactly do you say to that? If you say that it's not his choice then you are implying that your kid has no control over what they say or do but if you go along and confirm that yes, my son makes bad choices then you are negating the condition itself. Even my son's friend who has autism is told he makes 'bad choices' all day long! So frusterating.

weez

Jennita · 08-03-2007, 12:07 PM

I think teachers can make all the difference. But some just simply are not so good at it!. That's why maybe they should just do their job of teaching as best as they were trained to do, while realizing they are not psychologists nor psychics and should only offer helpful advice to parents in regards to making the most of their childs' education, not judge their child nor them.

Friendlee · 08-03-2007, 01:09 PM

I have a unique perspective because I was a child who was diagnosed with ADD and now I am a teacher. Most teachers were not trained in special ed. Typically they've had maybe 2 classes on it. And it was not narrowed down to disabilities, emotional disabilities, neurosis, etc. So they simply do not fully understand the in's and out's of a specific condition like ADD.

There is a fine line between what we can expect from teachers and what teachers can expect from children. It is probably hard for his teacher to tell which actions are choices and which ones are poor self control with no ill intent.

As a parent with a child who has a special need, it unfortunately falls on you (unless he is in special education classes) to provide the teacher with ideas and tools that help him. I mean it would be great if schools were a little more full service. I have seen schools that were and they were a total asset to the entire community.

Please don't let me insult you. If you've already done this I apologize. If you could send him with a fidget toy that is somewhat bland, serves only the purpose of keeping hands busy when he's reading or something I think that would help. Also, since ADD involves underfocosing as well as overfocusing, putting noise blocking headphones on can really aid an child with attention issues by helping them to overfocus on their work. Which is a good thing. A rocking chair in the room is a great place for a child to read as he can rythmically rock during reading time and get that sensory input he needs. He should also be able to run a lap every half hour around the school or the hall in order to reduce the amount of issues that hyper behavior brings. That is such a good antecedent exercise. And then also some understanding on your part as far as acknowledging that your child can be tough to handle. Lastly, when any of the students in my class have any medical issues, the parents usually give me an easy to read sort of pamphlet. It bullets things they'd like me to be aware of when handling their child as well as a list of things I could do throughout the day to prevent or redirect any troublesome situations.

I really do apologize if you've already been through this and I am wasting my breath. If so...well then darn! This teacher needs to figure out what works for your son!!

index.html · 08-03-2007, 01:48 PM

Wow, emilyfriend, great post! I wish my son could have had you for a teacher.

Jennita · 08-04-2007, 01:42 AM

Yes, very good and also you bring up exercise. I believe there is simply not enough of that in school and kids have way too much energy in general, ADD or not! Remember the movie "Kindergarten Cop"? He had them in "training", which included lots of exercise. Working them out might exhaust some of that energy and it's also good for them.