Should I hold back my son in 6th grade because he is too imature? - ADD / ADHD Message Board

Cari Batch · 02-23-2001, 09:41 PM

My son is in 6th grade and is very imature. I believe he may have ADD but my husband doesnt want to face it. I'm worried about the effects holding him back would have on him socially. He is also struggling in some areas of school. Has anyone experienced holding their kid back at this older age? Does any one have any advice to offer?

Babernethy · 02-26-2001, 06:44 AM

I work in the education field, and my wife is a teacher also. I myself am a computer specialist, working in a special education high school.
Maturity should not be a factor in your decision. Your sons grades should be. Is he passing by the 'skin of his teeth' or is he getting by OK? If he is just barely passing, or not passing, this is an indication that he should maybe be held back. You should speak to his teacher about how she feels.
Does he need extra help that you can provide? Does he need a tutor? Is his 'maturity level' to blame because he started school early?
Is he getting proper nutrition? Is he getting necessary vitmins? Are you giving him natural food and NO SUGAR PRODUCTS? All these things will make a difference.
Read my posting 'Add can be helped NATURALLY' for more insight. Take a good look at his diet and find out what is mising. Speak to the teacher, also. She will give you a very good indication of where to start!
Brad

alazay · 02-26-2001, 11:07 AM

You should get your son tested for ADD. If he has it, and gets on medication, this could fix the whole problem he has is school. Then you would not have to worry about holding him back. I wish that my parents would have tested me a long time before they did. I wouldn't hold your son back a grade unless you just HAD to. I think you should have him tested asap.

FaultyLogic · 02-26-2001, 01:26 PM

No!

Retention does more harm than good at this age level.

Sanvid · 02-28-2001, 02:20 PM

I would consider when his birthdate falls. Is he a young 6th grader? Research shows that kids that are immature for their grade level tend to strugle more socially, as well as academically. If my son were facing this, and was a younger 6th grader, I would not hestitate to hold him back. Self esteem can come in many packages. You have to ask yourself if the immaturity factor is causing some heart ache and rejection at school. Regarding the ADD... find out and help your husband to except the results. A great book to help dad's see ADD from a different perspective and help you to understand it, too is called "Hunter in a Farmer's World, a different perspective" by Thomas Hartman. It will give you some answers and Dad some peace. Good luck!!