My girlfriends has add and abusive family - ADD / ADHD Message Board

thesongoftime · 11-21-2002, 09:26 AM

Hi, I have been going out with this beautiful sweet wonderful girl for 6 months now. Her mom and sister continue to be verbally abusive to her while she continues to see me. We both love each other very much, but we had a little disagreement last week, and she kind of left me, but it was only like for a day or two. As soon as that event took place, her mom and sister have showered her with love. Only to lose that as soon as they realized we were still pretty much together. Here is the problem I need immediate help with if someone can. Her sister who is about the meanest thing walking this planet, even against her own sister, is taking my girl out friday. This sister sent me an e-mail telling me to quit calling her sister, that her sister dumped me to the curb and I need to forget about her. She is going to take her out Friday to meet guys. So, I have talked my girlfriend, and she said that its no big deal, she is going with her sister. Im not jealous here, I am just shocked that she would go out, with the same sister who is trying to take her kids, send me hatemail, calls her sister everything bad in the world. The same sister that sent me e-mail telling me all the secrets she had about my girlfriend, her own sister. I just dont get it, and I am scared that her sister is going to have some guys meeting up with them, and although my girlfriend has good intentions, why is she even going out with this horrible person?
Thanks for any help!

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Kenny!

pillsburydoughgirl · 11-21-2002, 03:16 PM

The apple doesn't fall to far from the tree!!!!!!!!
You sound like you mean well, but what does this have to do with this ADD forum?

Wingenit · 12-06-2002, 10:35 PM

I grew up in a very abusive family as well -- they tear each other down constantly.

Here's the thing I have found about other people who grew up the same way: if they don't recognize the problem & aren't repelled by it, they are doomed to repeat it. If your girlfriend doesn't see what her family is doing to her, she will probably wind up like them in the long run.

If she does see the problem but can't break away: she is going to continue to let them torment her until she finally gets enough. That may be never. If you like her well enough to put up with her family for hte rest of your life, keep seeing her. They are part of the package deal. If not, cut your losses now before you get any more involved.