Re: 7 year old adhd/stealing
When I was a child, I stole a lot of candy and quarters, because I got away with it easily. Everyone was too busy to notice. When I did get in trouble, too much time passed after I stole a thing, so when I did get punished, I didn't fully understand why or what for. I knew it wasn't right, but it felt rewarding. I usually stole when I was bored or felt jealous of what other children had. My mother's mother was a control freak and her attempts to discipline me worked at home, but not at the candy store. I usually acted out away from home. It was my way of validating my own existence. My father's mother cared for me differently. She listened to me despite my rambling and consistently encouraged me to express myself creatively. Eventually, the fear and humiliation of stealing wasn't worth the adrenaline rush and by that time I discovered I had a knack for performing arts. My new school incorporated performing arts as part of the language arts education program. Finally, a structured outlet to express my creative streak with others! Discovery within a discovery, I found that I performed well in team sports (soccer), measurably better than the boys in my class. I believe I stopped stealing, because earning my reward felt better. Today, I won't even steal paper clips from work.
I was a handful. Actually, 10 handfuls, but I wasn't a bad kid. I genuinely wanted to do well and wished hard to be liked by everyone. I learned that medication can quiet ADHD symptoms, but development takes time, because -the learning experience- is a process unique to everyone, including the caretaker.
I don't have kids, but I was once a kid and I was a disaster. My mom learned to be more of her resilient self...maybe not patient, but definitely resilient.