I have a seven year old daughter who is in kindergarten this year. We started having problems at the beginning of the year with stealing and some fighting nothing excessive just basic kid stuff on the fighting. The teacher moved her to the outskirts of the classroom in a little desk with her back turned from everyone which didnt help matters at all. In march I insisted she be put back with the rest of the class which seems to have helped her relationship with her peers but the stealing is still happening here and there. When she steals its snack money, we send her snack to school and she gets to pick it out at the store but its cheaper that way and she gets better stuff. We tried sending money and telling her she would lose the privelege if she stole but two days later she had stolen again She was diagnosed with ADHD in april and began taking adderol xr it seemed to be helping she hadnt stolen anything in over a month but she started chewing her fingernails and toenails until they bled because it was causing her anxiety and so we had to take her off of that. We are in transition to a new pediatrician because ours passed away about a week ago and they wont see her until they get all of her records. My daughter has been seeing a psych for about 3 months now. No punishment seems to help when it comes to this stealing we have tried it all. we are very consistent and stricter than most parents in my opinion. Both of our kids do what they are told and are very well behaved. She is not very hyper her whole problem is with impulsiveness. Her teacher is very unorganized and has not been in the classroom a lot this year for one reason or the other so I know that has not helped things at all and my daughter doesn't think that her teacher likes her, personally I don't either and this is not only my opinion it is also the opinion of some other moms in the class. I know that the impulsiveness is not the teachers fault but I do not think she is helping things. I just want to help my daughter at this point she is the scapegoat in her class whether she did it or not the kids blame her and the teacher said that herself. Her cheer coach thinks she is wonderful and says that she thinks the teacher is the whole problem because she doesn't give her any positive attention? I just dont know what to do and any advice would be very appreciated. thanks so much in advance
I also had a really rough time at that age. Teacher was awful, didn't want to deal with me, and of course back in the '80s little girls couldn't possibly be hyperactive, so I was labeled emotionally disturbed.
A new school year helped a lot. I got older and matured, I learned to think before I acted. Most ADHD kids do turn out fine as long as they have a stable and supportive family.
The summer is coming, you can get her in with a new pediatrician and, hopefully, the right medicine.
When I was a child, I stole a lot of candy and quarters, because I got away with it easily. Everyone was too busy to notice. When I did get in trouble, too much time passed after I stole a thing, so when I did get punished, I didn't fully understand why or what for. I knew it wasn't right, but it felt rewarding. I usually stole when I was bored or felt jealous of what other children had. My mother's mother was a control freak and her attempts to discipline me worked at home, but not at the candy store. I usually acted out away from home. It was my way of validating my own existence. My father's mother cared for me differently. She listened to me despite my rambling and consistently encouraged me to express myself creatively. Eventually, the fear and humiliation of stealing wasn't worth the adrenaline rush and by that time I discovered I had a knack for performing arts. My new school incorporated performing arts as part of the language arts education program. Finally, a structured outlet to express my creative streak with others! Discovery within a discovery, I found that I performed well in team sports (soccer), measurably better than the boys in my class. I believe I stopped stealing, because earning my reward felt better. Today, I won't even steal paper clips from work.
I was a handful. Actually, 10 handfuls, but I wasn't a bad kid. I genuinely wanted to do well and wished hard to be liked by everyone. I learned that medication can quiet ADHD symptoms, but development takes time, because -the learning experience- is a process unique to everyone, including the caretaker.
I don't have kids, but I was once a kid and I was a disaster. My mom learned to be more of her resilient self...maybe not patient, but definitely resilient.